Saturday, May 31, 2008


Something I have noticed out here in the wacky ass east:
K's mom, and several other women I have met, and a few girls, have all said basically the same thing.
"Don't buy me flowers, they just die."
One girl went on to say she'd rather have that money spent on a pedicure, or a dvd or cd.
Out west, most women I knew, and a few girls, would love to have a nice bouquet of flowers from a friend or relative to say "Hi, I am thinking about you and wanted to send you something beautiful"
(Sorry, sounds like an FTD commercial)
So I was struck. I asked this girl saying this a few more questions. She thinks that flowers are too expensive.
I asked, "What if your sweet heart grew them himself and cut them from his own garden?"
"I'd still rather have the pedicure." She said.
How sad.
Again, and I make this statement often so no one thinks I am stupid, but in the general sampling I have found, this is a common feeling.
Sad that some people would not want a little piece of beauty as a token of a loved one, but would rather have a tangible luxury item.
Is it just the younger girls? No, I find it, like I said, with K's mother.
Things are just different out west.
Go buy some one some flowers, not a pedicure.

Be well.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008


As I write this, I am sitting next to an open window listening to thunder and rain.
The work day ended and I was walking to the back room to enter my charges on a really bad program when I heard someone say" It's getting dark."
I knew there awas a chance of a t storm so I listened. But when you are in an institutional building made of cement and brick and mortar, it is heard to hear the outside world.
I sat down and logged in and, while waiting for the older Compaq p.o.s. to load up, I heard a rumble. It must have been very loud outside, because I could hear it so well in that back room.
I finished and helped a colleague out to her car with some paper for a presentation she is giving tomorrow. It was pouring.
I drove home noting the wet roads, the over full gurgling storm drains and the whish whoosh of cars hitting standing water.
The rain tapered as I got closer to home.
I was listening to the radio and thought I saw a bright flash. I killed the tunes and rolled down a window. I noticed there was no rain splashing down from above on the road to my house.
I had out run the rain, but the thunder was less than a 5 count from the lightning. Less than one mile.
I raced up the hill and into the house to free the puppies.
Poni won't pee in the rain.
I got them into the yard and every one was a peein' when I heard white noise coming at me. I looked down the block and saw the rain hitting the shiny slick asphalt. It was coming on, no stopping.
Bugsy squeezed off some solids but as the first drops of rain hit Poni's head, all her orifices locked down.
I put the puppies in and kept Puppette out to finish her duties. She lolly gags in the rain, but doesn't like the thunder.
I grabbed the mail, grabbed the garbage can and came in. Puppette got a towelling oof, I stripped out of pants wet to the skin and typed this.
The rain is still coming down, the thunder is still crashing about. puppette sits at teh foot of the bed, panting in stress and because it is warm. A warm spring rain.
Just listen...

Sunday, May 25, 2008


Wow, has it been a while?
C got offered a job at Hospital one. That is where I want to work. K works there so I can meet her everyday for lunch, bump into her in the halls as a pleasant surprise. They offered it to me on a Friday. I thought about it all weekend, discussing it with K. Not whether or not I should accept, but what I should ask for as far as scheduling and expectations. I do not know how many others were trying for the position, but I got it. That makes life just a bit easier.

We found a house. It is not much bigger than the hamster house, but it is nice. I stood in the kitchen and had goose bumps on my arms. It is fully fenced for the fur kin. K will have her own art room.
We signed contracts on Thursday. We will hear back from their attorney next week. The we venture into the morass that is home finance.
We are excited to get a place of ours that we can unpack in and get to the things we have done without for 9 months.

Today is a cleaning day. Our landlords want to put the house we are in back on the market in June. We need to clean it and make it presentable for showings. If everything works out well, we will move into the new house in July.

Didn't we just spend 5 months packing? We have to do this again?
I just think of my newly remodeled kitchen, silestone counters, maple cabinets, skylights, and stay focussed. I get to cook in a new kitchen. I can unpack my books. K can set up her art room and start creating again. The puppies will have a new yard to explore. We are less than 2 blocks from the water. Ahhhhhhhh.

Where are those boxes? I gotta pack.

Thursday, May 8, 2008


I do not remember if I wrote about K's mother saying she would just kill Poppy if K did not go to the store to get her some cigarettes.
In the past little while, I have noticed an interesting thing.
People in the east, not all of course, but a surprising number make threats to others.
"If you do that, I'll kill you."
"I'll give ya a smack."
"I wanted to slap her."
"I'll give you a smack if you do that."
"I'd kill her if she did that."

Where does this tendency towards threats come from?
Is it cultural?
Is it just how these people were raised as children, how their parents and grand parents spoke to them?
What is even more jaw dropping for me is that some of these were from Hospital staff toward patients. And it is accepted by the patient.
This really is not what I grew up with.

Maybe it is that population pressure again.
Maybe it is the Italian, Irish, German old world way of raising a child. I honestly do not know since I do not know very much about those cultures at all.

And speaking of Italians. I have noticed something else.
Out here, people wear their heritage proudly.
I have heard many people say "I'm Italian."
As if that is an explanation in and of itself.
I mentioned this to K and she said: "It is not an excuse, it is a reason."
I laughed at that and then thought on it for a while.
It is a reason to be the way you are.
From what I have noticed is that Italians can be loud, insulting, passionate, generous and proud.
I met a friend's parents, both immigrants from Italy. I came home with jam, blackberry and pepper jelly, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter thumb print cookies with the chocolate kiss in the center, and a handful of herbs from the early garden.
The fascination with these new people, their proclivities and idiosyncrasies.
The great experiment continues.

Monday, May 5, 2008


A nebulous concept, home.
A house is not one, but can be.
Is it really where the heart is?

K and I are looking for a house.
That is not news, you all know that.
We have found two that would do. They do not knock our socks off, make us gasp in awe at the jewel we have found. We will have to put some work into them to get the kitchen I want.
Our criteria are kinda picky. I want a big kitchen I am comfortable cooking in. K wants a studio space. We are both committed to seeing the other gets what they want.
But the market, the cost of living here and our salaries do not provide us a large price range.
So we look at space, stairs, location in relation to busy roads since one certain brown dog is an escape artist who runs away when called. (embarrassing for an accomplished dog handler to admit)
We were wowed by one house but it went off market, some one else beat us to it.
So house one is nice, the bedroom would face east so K could have morning light to wake her up, two upstairs rooms, a fully finished basement, but no deck and horrid stairs leading down to the back yard.
House two overlooks a golf course in back, no neighbors there except golfers in good weather. It has two rooms upstairs, a beautiful deck. The bedroom would be on the ground floor with a north facing window so no morning light to wake K.
It is tough.
Our lease is up soon and the land lords here want to start showing this house for sale so we need to get moving.
This is the biggest decision K and I have ever made, it is a shit load of money, and we have to like coming home after work, not dreading a poor decision.

We have looked at every house in the areas we have chosen and these are the two best.
I don't know, I just don't know.
I just want to go home, where ever that is.